Sunday, January 29, 2012

My Night of Danger

I could have died! I could have died...and Oilburner was wandering around less than 100 feet away. He was oblivious to my screams for help. Oblivious or intentionally ignoring me. I will reserve my opinion for now.

I was in the garage and trapped by my bikes. Oilburner had walked away without a second thought as to my well being.

I was trapped with the only option being to spend the night there hollering my foolish head off or hurting both of my bikes. Apparently I was opting for the foolish. Come hell or high water I wasn't hurting my bikes if I didn't have to.

What happened, you ask? For a first, after pulling into the garage, Oilburner closed the garage door. Closed the door before the bikes were completely put up. He had dismounted and rushed into the house, taking care of the alarm. I wasn't in danger yet, and this was just standard operating procedure.

I sat there enjoying the bike under my butt, while slowly removing my gloves and helmet. I easily rested the helmet on the mirror of my other bike. The problem now rears its ugly head. I put the kickstand down, begin to lean the bike over, and bam...right into the saddlebags on the R12R. This wasn't going to work.

With the garage door down I was limited in how much I could maneuver the GS. I look a quick shot and tried to execute a 9 point sashay with the GS to move it a little farther away from the R.

Nope. Not enough. I sit there for a second and wonder where the hell Oilburner is?? He's normally right back in the garage polishing his bike. I make a quick holler but hear nothing indicating he might have heard me.

I take stock. I don't have the Flass2Pass on the GS. So I can't open the garage door. I can't reach the key on the R to get its opener working. As I am pondering I hear the front door open. What??

I take my chances and make another 9 point sideslip. Better. I can lean the bike farther, but still no luck in landing it all the way on the sidestand.

What is this? Where is Oilburner??

I start screaming my fool head off a lot louder. Oilburner finally comes running.

He takes a gander at my predicament and just about doubles over laughing. I wasn't as amused. He opens the garage door so I can finallly maneuver the bike enough...and I promptly attempt to set the GS on the side stand...without actually making use of the sidestand. At least Oilburner was there for that one.

The mess gets sorted out. I am finally able to dismount with both of my bikes intact. My pride isn't quite so lucky. I'm still screaming, for different reasons now, to find out that Oilburner had wandering around disrobing of his riding gear, actually plugging his helmet in, sauntering down to the mailbox and picking up the days offerings. All while I am in grave danger.

Wait. Strike that. I didn't almost die. But if Oilburner keeps up the snickering...he might.


  1. Reading betwwen the lines.....perhaps it is time to clean out the garage! Sorry just kind of spung to mind.

  2. Wow. Hold back the sympathy. You don't want to hurt yourself. My danger and you just shrug it off and insult me... sheesh. Some friend. hehehehe

  3. Hmmmm, no remote in your pocket? Should have used your cell phone and called him... or 911. Glad you were eventually saved, next time you pull in first and let him deal with the bikes.

  4. You tell it in such a humorous way it is hard to imagine the panic that would set in when you can't dismount.

    I hope you can laugh about it now.

    I think I would have been on my horn until the battery died or Troubadour came to give me hell for honking the damn horn, lol.

    Glad all turned out well.

  5. No pics! What's up with that? I'm sure there was time to grab a quick photo before rescue procedures began. :)
    Glad all ended well!

    I hear you though. I hate that helpless feeling when getting in a situation with the bike that I can't fix myself.

  6. Steel Cupcake:

    I sort of had the same problem, but I couldn't get out. I had parked my bike on the street, 45° angle to the street with the bike leaned over and close to a car on the right. There was no room for anyone to park next to me but then a H-D comes and parks so close to me he scratches my side cases. I didn't know this at the time but then I couldn't angle my bike far enough to the right to be able to get my bike out. It was also on a slight downward incline.

    I think it was good that you got "trapped". I think I would have gone to bed and checked up on you in the morning

    Riding the Wet Coast

  7. I apologize for laughing at your expense, but my defense is I suspect you meant me to. Well, done...the writing not the getting in the situation in the first place.

    Good to see a post. I've missed you. ~k

  8. Thank you Troubadour. And this is where I wonder if it wasn't a setup. Oilburner had my phone on his bike!! And this garage door doesn't have any openers. They have been lost to the layers of stratified detritis in the garage....if they ever existed at all. :) I like your ultimate solution. ; hehehe

  9. Hi Torbaritz, Thankfully I could see the humor in the situation, but that doesn't mean I was laughing.. It was just frustrating.. The ONE time he closes the garage door. Now he will use this as an excuse never to do it again. All or nothing. But yes, I don't like the feeling of being stuck...

    LOL. Ah...the horror. hehehe

  10. Hi Bluekat! I've been instructed to tell you that the thought had crossed his mnd, but his sense of self preservation won out in the end. I can tell you that his perceptions were probably correct. ;)

    I agree...being stuck isn't an enjoyable experience.

  11. Wow Bobskoot! Really? You would have left me there overnight? Without thought of what might have happened to you, or your bike, when I made my way out? No forethought! :) Very dangerous...on your side.

    Your just bitter and concerned that the precious R could have been hurt in the process.

  12. Hi Circle Blue! What? Me wanting you to laugh at my expense? Never!! And boy oh boy, it was good of you to clarify the dilemma. :) Like I said, I could see the humor, but it doesn't mean that I was laughing. :) (Outside...)

  13. I don't know about your BMWs but my FJR 1300 has a center stand. If I don't have room to lean it over onto the sidestand I can just pop it up onto the center stand. No problem....

  14. Hi Ray, you are correct. And the thought had crossed my mind to give that a try. It was next on the list to try if the screaming didn't pay off that time. I just didn't think I would be able to pull it off at that angle. I might have to practice in case it "happens" again. ;)

  15. I'm glad that you survived unscathed. One of the hazards of multiple bike ownership.

  16. Steel Cupcake:

    Quote: " Wow Bobskoot! Really? You would have left me there overnight?

    LOL: I was just kidding . . . I wouldn't want anything to happen to MY "R" would we ?

    I love "R's" . . .

    Riding the Wet Coast

  17. had a center stand but didn't try to use it? Sounds almost like my soon-to-be-ex wife when she called me all upset because the battery had died in the key fob for the remote door locks and she couldn't get into the locked car.

    ummm....use the key....

    LOL! Actually...ever since the bolt for my side stand on my old 84 Venture broke one time I tend to use the center stand most of the time with all my bikes. It's just a good thing to know how to do anyway. It's usually more about technique than strength to get the bike up on the center stand.

    Ray from Douglasville

  18. Hi RichardM, I was wondering when that idea would be brought up. ;). But as someone else has pointed out...better to be trapped on the bike instead of under the bike. I just need to be bett prepared next time. Cards, music, something to keep me quiet and consume my time. Hehehe

  19. Bobskoot? Kidding? Nah...can't see it. Hehehe.

    No R bikes were damaged in the writing of this blog. :)

  20. Hi Ray! LOL. At least I would have had the presence of mind to use the keys. Hehe. But I feel impelled to go practice putting the bike on the center stand while on it. Jeez...making me improve my skills. ;)

    Do I get credit for at least having thought about it? I wouldn't even want to think about the bolt breaking!!

  21. Don't know that you can put the bike on the center stand while sitting on it.

    If you could get off while still holding it upright then putting it on the center stand would keep it up straight instead of leaned over.

    Luckily when the bolt snapped on the Venture it didn't fall over...just leaned a bit more. That 800 pound pig is tough to pick up when it falls over!

    Remember one time in MS where I put the Venture on the centerstand on some fairly fresh blacktop. When I came back out of the Celtic music fest the bike was sitting firmly on both wheels with the legs of the stand burried a couple inches into the pavement.

    Of course...if I had put it on the side stand it would have ended up falling over.

    Ray in Douglasville

    PS...know anyone that wants a good deal on a 1984 Venture?

  22. I promise to be the first not to laugh at your expense. ( cough, cough ) Seriously ( cough...snort ). Sorry, I must be coming down with a cold, or something.

    I have a photo I'll have to post pretty soon on my blog. It's one of those "imagine what could have happened" sort of things.

    Take care!