Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Riding Double is For the Birds

Double 2

I do not like this riding double
I do not like this toil and trouble
I do not like this riding two up
I am here to tell you it sucks, sucks, sucks!

Double 1

I can not see through his silver lid
I can not see the road ahead
I can not see if we will go straight
I can not see if it were the Golden Gate!

I had to contort to get on that bike
My bum, it hurt, after a short, short ride
Maybe if I were thin, thin, thin
I would not cry this awful din

I have to trust, will he ride us true
I have to wonder, does he have a clue
I do not like the way he drives
I do not like that I am not the eyes

Double 4

Control I need, in my own hands
Control I need for all speed bands
I chop my fingers into his sides
Like a horseman spurs his horse's hide

 As his hand twists off the throttle
The sudden deceleration does not coddle
Our lids they knock, my body unable
To stop us acting like Newton's Cradle

I refrain from tickling to regain my pride
I really do want to make it home alive
I love him dearly, but he heard words
Riding double is for the birds.


  1. Although Heather has made some noise about riding two up, I can't imagine her enjoying it. Why? Because of the "control" thing you mention.

    A Can Am Spyder? Maybe two up. I joke that if my Yaris had a sunroof it would be a Spyder with an extra wheel.

    Sidecar? Maybe.

    Oh well, time will tell here, but I think you made your verdict on riding two up very very clear.

    Fun post and good work,

  2. Lori

    Definitely not a back seat driver then?

    Mrs Nikos "seems to enjoy" riding behind me and she provides useful auto steering and back/shoulder massage functions. She has a full motorcycle licence too but is hanging back on purchasing a bike...

  3. Lori: we should have never given you the opportunity to VOTE, nor give you the car keys. We should have just locked you up in the cabin. Now that you have experienced the freedom of flight and seen a bit of the outside world we can't go back . . .

    Wet Coast Scootin

  4. Excellent poem but tell us how you really feel...


  5. So, I take it, you really don't like riding pillion, eh !?!
    Lovely poem.

  6. Lori:

    I've never ridden pillion but in your case I could make an exception. I'm just waiting for those magic words "hold on tighter . . ."

    Wet Coast Scootin

  7. lol - love the poem :)
    Even though I have my own bike, I still love to ride pillion. I'd opt for it more often, but I don't want to cheat Ron out of an opportunity to ride on his own.

  8. Very cute poem..and cuts to the truth! I would rather have my spouse with me, but I would also rather ride solo. So, it's either two up, or go alone...

  9. Excellent words. Clever poem. Great writer. I loved reading it. Thanks!

  10. Thank you everyone! I really had fun writing this. Riding double wasn't as bad on the RT. I only made it about 10 feet on the Suzuki before screaming to let me off. I would probably be more willing if my tush was more receptive to that seat. :) But I still would rather be the driver.

    @Keith: Does Heather have any interest in riding her own? I would definitely recommend the Can Am or the Aprillia Piaggio MP3.

    @Nikos: I'm glad Mr. Nikos enjoys pillion and you have the benefit of massages. I sure hope that you reciprocate when you get off the bike. :)

    @Bobskoot: Trying to repeal women's suffrage in one fell swoop of a motorcycle throttle? :) But the stopper is out of the bottle and Mrs. Skoot, SonjaM, Bluekat and I are not going back! HA!

    @David: Thank You! I was particularly proud of Newton's Cradle. LOL

  11. @Raftnn: Thank You! I laugh at it.

    @RichardM: I'm guessing my point wasn't clear...or was it too clear? LOL.

    @SonjaM: Would you ride pillion after tasting the life that Nella and Swing have to offer? :) I would probably do it again...if I had to. hehe

    @Bobskoot: You are channeling your inner Riepe. ;) LOL

    @Bluekat: Did you start riding pillion then move to your own bike? It is nice that you have the opportunity to go solo or pillion depending on the day.

    @Ken: I hadn't thought of it from a guys perspective and riding with a passenger. I haven't taken the plunge yet and put Mr. Oilburner on the back to learn how to ride with a pillion yet. So your spouse isn't thinking of getting her own bike yet?

    @Gary: I'm glad you enjoyed it. I had fun with it. Thank You!

    Everyone: I'm glad you enjoyed it. I had fun writing it. Thank you for commenting and coming back!

  12. Dear Beemer Girl (Lori),

    In reading that poem, I couldn't help but see you wearing this enormous, bent stovepipe, red and white hat.

    Tell me, how do you feel about green eggs and ham?

    Fondest regards,
    Jack • rep • Toad
    Twisted Roads

  13. Hi Jack!

    I rather enjoy green eggs and ham...when they are fresh. Of course, I haven't eaten them since kindergarten...

    Just might have to get a cat in the hat sticker.