Trikes and Leather

I've been avoiding the motorcycle shows.  Don't get me wrong, it wasn't a situation where I was boycotting them or anything.  I'm just not big into crowds and will generally avoid getting myself into situations where I can make a fool of myself.  OK.  Fine.  A fool of myself when I am not expressly trying to.  Am I the only one to psych myself out when thinking of attending a function like this and just envision forgetting to put the kickstand down and knocking over a line of bikes like dominoes?  or stalling the bike as I try to make my clean escape, when everyone is watching me because my bike is that awesome and my butt looks damn hot on it?  Does anyone else worry about these things?

No?  I knew it.  I am a loser...  :)

And all y'all are liars...

OK.  I really don't think about those things as much anymore.  But I'm still not necessarily enthusiastic about attending because I don't want to spend any more money on gear that I don't need, or hopefully won't fit in, in a couple of months.  And I certainly don't want, and can't afford, another bike.  Also I just don't like the general public that much to be jostling for floor space and breathable air.

But...the hype has started.  It began with one of those moto-magazines that sometimes hitches a ride home from the market in my shopping bag.  The picture caught my eye.  Then the discussions at a coffee & chat with one of our groups started.  Turns out one of the guys has already put his money where his mouth was.  Then some blog buddies start bantering merits about.  Turns out one of them has also committed.  The situation escalates when Bobskoot and George F attend their respective motorcycle shows and start posting pictures and first impressions...

The Yamaha Super Ténéré

2012 Yamaha Super Ténéré.  Picture from web.

You guys don't have a heart...  :'(

Armed with a spark of excitement, and a sinking dread, knowing that this is going to be a bike I will wind up lusting after, I decided to attend our motorcycle show.  I am hoping to at least get a look and feel to see if my desire is warranted.

Mr. Oilburner and I initially plan on going early Saturday, hoping to avoid the worst of the crowds.  And we sit there Friday night discussing logistics of arrival, depature and post-show destination rides when I slap my forehead in wonderment.  Why are we sitting here when we could be at the show right now?!?  They are open for another 3 hours and this will free up all of Saturday for riding.  The new plan is executed.  And it satisfies my desire for no crowds.

The first booth after the entrance is the World of Wheels (WOW) display...hawking many BMW's and sports bikes.  They are a large seller of used bikes.  Nothing I am interested in, but promising...

But the next display is trike conversions.  OOookkkaaayyyy....

Unfortunately we have a friend that likes monstrosities like this.  But I don't find them terribly attractive.  We take pictures to remind ourselves of "the horror".  But then we see some of the options and suspension... Damn!!  Just get a Smart Car.  It would probably be cheaper.

Then we move into some of the retail stuff.  Mostly involving sewing patches onto leather jackets and obnoxious helmet stickers.

I see the Harley shirt display and snap this picture for RiePe.  My requisite hot chick shot for the evening.  Cuz this place is mostly crawling with scruffy, scuzzy, dirty, hairy guys in tight leather.  Not hairly in any good way, and the leather is tight in ALL the wrong places...  Use your imagination, because I wasn't taking a picture.

I came to this thing for two reasons: find those gloves made for heated grips (with one layer in the palms and dual layers on the back of the hand) and the Super Ténéré.  I start asking around for the gloves and no one understand the concept.  What?  Don't believe in winter riding or something?  Which leads me into why I think they don't believe in winter riding...  Beyond WOW's and Blue Moon's (BMW dealer) booths all this place has to offer is trikes!!!  Every corner we turn to traverse another isle of wares is geared towards trikes.  Trikes and leather...  That is all this show is catering to!

Pathetic!

Trikes, leather and Harley "bad boy" and "bad girl" jewelry.

Double Pathetic!

I guess the Atlanta market is for a bunch of old foggies in tight leathers, long beards full of birds nests, wearing chains that jingle, crawling down the road on trikes.  But you better believe they had all of the accoutrement  to deck their backrests out in leather bustier that lifted and spread, above tiny, boy shorts with suggestive sayings plastered across their backsides, and more chains that snaked from the dog collar around the neck, to the piercings on the chest and down to the waist.  The guys could look like crap but the girls had to be drop dead gorgeous...at least in these outfits. I mean, according to them, you can always put a bag over their head...

I just love the way female riders are being acknowledged in my area of the world.  Apparently the men here believe we aren't supposed to ride.  We just better look good.

But about that second reason for being here...  Yamaha isn't here... 

No Super Ténéré...  :(

What is this show coming to?  Vancouver and New York get hot bikes and great displays.  We get trikes and leather.

The saving grace comes from the vintage displays and custom builds.

So for all of my buddies out there, come ride the twisties, eat some great BBQ and enjoy Spring and Autumn.  Don't come for the motorcycle show.  And for all you guys that have laid your hands on the Yamaha, or even gotten to test ride one...Andrew aka the Rider...know that you are slowly killing a little girl inside.  I am pouting.  I hope you feel a small amount of remorse that I am languishing here.

Why is Mr. Oilburner laughing uncontrollably at that last paragraph??  ;)