How to stay positive...

...when you have to wake up at 4:30 (after 3 hours of sleep), be out of the house at 5:30, to get to the airport at 6:30 to catch a flight to NJ at 8:00

...when you are looking for a parking space and get trapped in a one-way lane to exit the parking area (because there are no point of no return signs), causing you to have to completely drive around the airport again to get back

...when the client address takes you to the middle of their campus, not their building

...when you need client approval to get through their security gate and your colleague didn't warn you (and he was the one that set up the meeting)

...when you call for the taxi at the end of the day and he encounters all the same problems as above

...when your taxi driver misses the exit for the airport, and side streets are congested with rush hour traffic.  Said setback of 20+ minutes

...when your taxi driver also can't follow signs to your terminal and again delays arrival by another 10+ minutes  (Uber driver, so shouldn't be due to length of ride)

...when you have TSA pre-check, and the pre-check lanes are closed

...when you have to enter the same long queue as everyone else, but have a laminated card saying that you don't have to take your shoes off to go through security.  Still have to remove the laptop and any electronics larger than a cell phone, though.

...when your flight is delayed by 15 minutes

...when your flight is delayed by another 15 minutes  (and yes, this was a day flight, there and back)

...when the plane is freezing, everything feels damp, and you could only sleep before takeoff

...when your parking ticket gets folded in half, the machine is not able to read it and tells you to proceed to a cashier or call support

...when support doesn't answer, and doesn't help

...when you have to signal to the guy behind you to back up, because you certainly can't proceed forward to a cashier

...when you finally make it to a cashier and you have to stretch out of your car because she is too lazy to reach halfway for your card

...when she says the first card won't scan (corporate card)

...when the second card won't scan and the error message is "card is invalid or inserted backwards"  (stupid cashier)

...when you can't get through traffic to exit the airport and have to circle the airport again (3 times in 1 day!!)

...when you finally get headed towards home and wonder what is for dinner at 11 pm, since you haven't eaten anything but eggs at 6:00 am

...when you say "fuck it, I'm having McDonald's because I want a chocolate shake"

...when you drive to the McDonald's beyond your house because the one on the way home is in a sketchy neighborhood, and the one closest to home hasn't fixed their broken drive-thru in over 3+ years (order at the final window and wait)

...when you finally get to the "good McDonald's" and order and think all is well

...when you get to the window and they tell you the shake machine has shut itself down, would I like something else or a refund

...when you ask for a refund and provide your card and then ask for a diet coke

...when you are told that they are out of diet coke

...when you finally select Dr Pepper...and get your food, and they have refunded your card and you start to drive away and they yell at you that you haven't paid (even though they had your card and you have a refund!!)

...when you can't back up because the car behind you has already moved forward

...when you have to pull forward, wait for the manager to come get your card again and charge dinner

...when you finally get to walk in the door at 11:30 pm

...when you are getting ready for bed at 12:30 and discover that you foot is BLUE and realize that the "damp" feeling on the plane was actually real and the toilet on the plane was leaking and dyed your sock and foot blue

...sigh...another day in paradise...or so they tell me